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Hands up who has nipples the size of dinner plates?
Yep, I see a few uncomfortable nodding heads.
What about a show of hands for those with hairy nipples!
Come on, I know you’re out there.
Let’s have a show of hands from those ladies who have breastfed for so long that they could swing CDs from their nipples!
Yes, it’s funny because it’s true.
Who else has permanent 'High Beams'?
Yes, No?
Not joking! I have permanent erect nipples. Not the sexy kind, but the kind that happens after breast implants where you have nerve damage from the surgery. Might be fun in my 20’s but not so much when I forget my bra whilst running late after feeding horses and have to drop my 2 kids off at their Catholic School class rooms!
2 words
Nipple Chaff
I have to be mindful of the bras I wear, if the material is a little course, my nipples chaff. Now that’s sexy right!
God bless silicone nipple covers!
Except when you live in North Qld, in the Whitsundays, in summer!
Yes, beautiful location, perfect beaches, endless summer, bikinis in winter, and all that!
Sweating so hard that my silicone nipple covers slide right off, slip down my dress, and slap onto the floor in the cafe while I’m waiting for my coffee!
So, of course, I:-
Bend and snap!
Pick that slippery little sucker right up, wipe it on my dress and reposition like a pro.
Nothing to see here!
Enter La Femme Petite. Lets sign this together - 'Hallelujah'
Tape them extrovert nipples back into submission and dance up a storm in 98% humidity knowing full well that if I happen to have a wardrobe malfunction, you’ll be asking me what brand my nipple cover is!
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